Jeff Flesch 8:00 am on January 31, 2021
Tags: creatingyourlifeanew, journaling ( 4 ), lawofattraction ( 2 ), lifecoach, manifestations, Meditation ( 22 ), perspectiveandreality, practice, reflecting ( 11 ), talking, thebody, thoughtsandfeelings ( 2 ), Writing ( 94 )

The Law of Attraction

A Few Simple Steps to Create a Whole New Reality for Your Life

I’ve been thinking and reflecting upon writing an article on the law of attraction for a while now. Though some people may consider the law of attraction a metaphysical topic, which it is, it is also quite scientific, and, well, quite frankly, part of how the Universe works.

Why is this important?

Well, if you are interested in achieving goals in life, then the law of attraction will be important to you. And, I’d say most people are interested in achieving the goals they have for themselves.

Furthermore, if you are interested in getting outside of a loop of negative thought patterns, understanding the law of attraction, in a very practical way, is also important.

Before we get into our discussion, let’s define the law of attraction.

Law of attraction
The belief that positive thoughts are magnets for positive life experiences and negative thoughts (i.e. the very cynical definition previously provided for this term) are magnets for negative life experiences.
Urban Dictionary

There we go.

Alright, in this article we will take a look at the law of attraction from three perspectives. All of which, combine to form a unified whole. Ready? Good. Here we go.

Thoughts and Feelings

It is factual that how we think creates our reality. Let’s do a quick example to show how this works. I want you to think about a time when you were really frustrated about something, and that frustration lasted for at least a day, maybe longer. Many of us have experienced this type of frustration.

When you were frustrated in this way, how did the world look, feel, and function to you? Likely, it functioned in a frustrated way. Meaning, that you saw and experienced people that seemed frustrated to you. And, you likely blamed them for your apparent frustration. The issue?

Well, no one outside of ourselves is responsible for how we think and feel. They are not. Therefore, when we experience frustration in the world, and it affects us in some way, we are likely, on some level, frustrated ourselves.

Knowing this to be true about ourselves is not a demerit. It’s not. It just happens. And, happens often for people that are unaware of how their thoughts and feelings affect their actions.

You can conversely think about a time when you were joyful, again for a sustained period of time, and I bet you saw and experienced much more joy. Right? Yep. Same.

All of this simply means that it is how we think and feel that creates our reality. And, if we are stuck inside of negative thinking patterns, as I once was, we will experience our beautiful world through a lens of negativity. And, conversely, if we are “stuck” inside of positive thinking patterns, we will experience our beautiful world through a lens of positivity.

Your Body and Manifestations

And, whether we see the world negatively or positively matters and manifests throughout our body. Why? Because human beings have a tendency to hold onto their emotions. Therefore, if we are seeing the world through a negative lens, we will experience more negative emotions, and holding these emotions within ourselves will cause pain and suffering.

Further, when we see the world through a negative perspective, or cynically, we will typically make justifications and excuses for our negative behavior. Meaning, abusing our body in ways that will end up causing us more pain and suffering. An example here may help.

For many years I saw the world through a very cynical lens. It’s not a demerit. As a matter of fact, I understand this time in my life as a blessing today. Yes, it was painful, yet it was how I knew how to live in the world, and, therefore, has, upon much reflection and internal work, given me many insights.

Insights which help me tremendously today as a parent, friend, coworker, and leader. Immensely helpful.

When I was stuck in these negative thinking patterns, I held onto my anger. And, therefore I saw anger everywhere. And, I mean everywhere. Yet, I had no conception at the time that the anger I was seeing was my own. And? It was.

It was my anger, because I was the one thinking about and feeling anger, thus I gave out anger often, which caused others to be angry. Further, I could sense anger very easily, as I was in a more or less constant state of anger.

Fast forward 4 years, and my experience of life today is completely different. And, it has everything to do with how I think and feel; and, how those thoughts and feelings bring more of the same into my life; and, that, in essence and practicality is the law of attraction.

Perspective and Reality

How we think and feel affects our perspective, as we’ve just discussed, thus affecting our experience of reality. I’ve written before that there are over 7 billion worlds, or realities, on this one planet. It’s true.

Each of us has a different experience of life, based on, yes, how we were raised, the life experiences we’ve had, and how we currently think and feel.

How we think and feel brings more of those same thoughts and feelings into our life. There are some that say that thoughts are just like any other thing on this planet; meaning that they are made of matter, just like we are.

And, when thought and feeling matter are manifest in our day-to-day experience we get back more of that same matter.

As simple as all of this may sound and read, it is not necessarily easy, or simple, to create new thinking and feeling patterns, or habits. Human beings like to stay in their comfortable patterns, even when those patterns are likely hurting themselves and those around them.

Practice

Because habits are hard to change, let’s take a look at a few strategies I use daily to continue to iterate my thinking and feeling.

Meditation – a meditation practice, when guided by an expert, can be transformative. When we learn to sit in silence, we get to see and experience our thoughts and feelings in a whole new way. And, in seeing and experiencing our thoughts and feelings in new ways, we create the possibility of working through these thoughts and feelings, and eventually releasing them.
Writing – I’ve been journaling in different ways for years now. I find the experience very therapeutic. There is something about actually seeing your thoughts and feelings on paper that creates a space to dive deeper into why you are thinking and feeling as you are. It’s like a thread, which you can use to trace thoughts and feelings back to their origins.
Talking – finding someone to talk to about how you think and feel is another way to open yourself up to new ways of thinking and feeling. As I’ve mentioned many times, I’ve been seeing a life coach for 4 years now, and inside of those conversations, I get a whole different perspective on why I am thinking and feeling as I am. And, with a different perspective comes new possibilities.
Reflecting – one of my favorite parts of the process of getting to know yourself on a deeper level is reflection. I reflect often, and use the knowledge gained in my reflections to continue to move myself forward as a human being. Insights from reflecting can come at any time, however, creating quite time for yourself throughout the day, so you can reflect is important. If we are continuously plugged in and receiving stimulation, there is less time to reflect, and therefore less insight will come.

Alright, that concludes this post on the law of attraction.

Remember, we truly are what we think and feel. Our thoughts and feelings shape our perspective and thus our reality; and , it takes time and practice to begin to create new thought and feeling patterns, or habits, for ourselves.

Therefore, as you walk through your day today, begin to question your thoughts and feelings. And, make sure to create quiet time for yourself so you can begin to see why it is you think and feel as you do.

Once you begin to create time for yourself to reflect, you will get insights about yourself, which will create new possibilities for your life. And, it’s inside of these new possibilities, where you can begin to create new thinking and feeling habits, which will create new experiences of the same world you lived in before.

And, through the law of attraction, you will begin to attract a whole new reality into your life.

#creatingyourlifeanew, #journaling, #lawofattraction, #lifecoach, #manifestations, #meditation, #perspectiveandreality, #practice, #reflecting, #talking, #thebody, #thoughtsandfeelings, #writing

Jeff Flesch 9:27 pm on September 30, 2020
Tags: beingunlimited, development ( 35 ), distinctionbetweentheoryandpractice, growing ( 5 ), onwriting ( 6 ), owningourlimitations, practice, selfdimprovement, theory ( 2 ), theoryandpractice ( 3 ), Writing ( 94 ), writingaboutpractice, writingabouttheory, writingandthoughtfulness, writingandtrasnparency, writingandtruth

3 Reasons Why Writers Should Know About the Distinction Between Theory and Practice

Alright, so I’m making my way through some Medium stories, and I get to this one, Meditation Is a Terrible Strategy for Self-Improvement, by the Cut.

As some of you know, I started practicing meditation about three years ago; taught to me by someone that spent 15 years in India. And it has been one of the most important developmental inquiries in my life. So, of course, when I read that title, I was like, wait, what?!

Of course I read it. And?

The writer completely missed the point of meditation. Further, the “expert” the writer draws examples from throughout the article is questionable, at best, as an authority on meditation.

Well, what followed then was an important distinction for writers that came as an insight of reading the article. The distinction? Yep, here we go.

I’ve written a couple times about the importance of making the distinction and understanding the difference between theory and practice. The distinction between the two is paramount in organizational development and education.

Yet, what I’ve been reflecting upon more this past week is just how important the distinction between theory and practice is for writers. Yep.

As I’ve been writing for years, I think I’ve always understood this distinction, yet it’s really only been the past three years that I’ve really known about it. Did you catch the distinction? Ah, if you did, excellent, if not, never fear.

Before we get into the discussion of theory and practice, let’s define our terms.

theory

noun /ˈθɪəri/ /ˈθiːəri/, /ˈθɪri/ (plural theories)

[countable, uncountable] a formal set of ideas that is intended to explain why something happens or exists
Oxford Learner’s Dictionaries

practice

noun /ˈpræktɪs/ /ˈpræktɪs/

[uncountable, countable] doing an activity or training regularly so that you can improve your skill; the time you spend doing this
Oxford Learner’s Dictionaries

Very good. Now, what do you see? Yep, it’s pretty straight forward.

Theory is about idea generation. About trying to explain something to the best of one’s ability by rationalizing the knowledge one has about a subject through their intellect. Yep, that’s about it. Practice?

Different. Practice is about doing something. It is about understanding a subject through the practice of actually doing that subject; and, then explaining that subject through the practical knowledge now possessed.

Now, both are needed. Yep. We need both intellectual knowledge and practical knowledge. However, theoretical knowledge can never supersede practical knowledge. Why?

Because no matter how much we know about a subject, we can never really know about that subject until we engage in it. Example? Sure.

Let us say I want to create a new budget. One that will connect all of my daily spending to my bank accounts, which will then funnel back to a spreadsheet that I can track daily.

I can theorize about how a new budget system like this might work by reading about it, however, I will never really know if it will work for me until I try it. Simple, right? Yep.

Why, then, is this important to writers? Because when we write, and we are writing about something that we are theorizing about, we should own it.

We should let the reader know that the piece they are reading is a theoretical exploration, not a practical one. Why?

Alright, here are

3 Reasons Why Writers Should Know About the Distinction Between Theory and Practice

1. Transparent

Being transparent about the subject matter we write about is important. It’s important to our own development, as writers, yes, and as human beings; and, it’s also important to the reader.

When we write about a topic that we know intellectually, that’s fine, write about it that way. Letting the reader know that you are conducting a theoretical exploration is just fine, and needed.

Have you ever heard the phrase theory informs practice, and practice informs theory? It’s true.

When we theorize about how something might work, we will only ever really know if that theory will hold true by conducting an experiment, yes, or by simply doing it. Yep.

And, when we do something, like create the budget from the aforementioned example, we will learn things we did not, could not, theorize about; and, we can then recreate the theory in light of this new information. Finished? Nope, not quite. Why?

Because someone else might conduct the same experiment with the budget system, let’s say, and get a completely different outcome, or experience. Yep.

I once had an instructor that would say, show me any theory, and I can show you a mitigating variable for that theory. Meaning another idea that would change the outcome of the experiment, or experience.

Therefore, it is very important when writing to elaborate on the knowledge that we currently have, both intellectually and practically. It helps readers know where the limits of our knowledge is, and where they can pick up from, if they choose, and move that knowledge forward.

2. Thoughtful

In owning the limitations of our own knowledge, whether it is intellectual or practical, we are being thoughtful. I love reading an article or a book about a topic where the author has been intentional in communicating the limits of their knowledge.

As a reader, this kind of commitment from a writer garners a whole different level of trust from me. And, I am more likely to read more of their work.

Being thoughtful about our own limitations is an important thing to do; though, it will probably feel awkward and scary. Human beings don’t usually like to own their own limitations.

Yet, I would argue that owning our limitations is not, in and of itself a limitation. Rather, owning our limitations is a starting point, a strength.

A place from where we can grow and develop. Learn more, both intellectually and practically.

And, in that growth, guess what? We learn more, which means we can do more, and be more. We can write more. More about what we know about. Both intellectually and practically. Fun.

3. Truth

Of course. When we stand in our truth, we get back way more. Though owning a limitation feels scary, it is the only way we can ever grow and develop. If you have no limitations, or rather, areas to grow yourself, then there is nothing to ever read, or really do.

Life inside of that world, where we know all there is to know, is finite. That world is the limited one.

However, when we are truthful about our own developmental opportunities, we immediately become unlimited. Why?

Because we have now taken a stand to learn more, to develop more, and to possibly transform the person we are today into a whole new iteration. A new self that stands in the reality, or truth, about themselves. That is powerful. A paradox?

Yes, and no. The whole world is full of paradoxes like this one.

We are fearful of the exact thing that, when embraced, is the key to relinquishing that exact fear. That is life as a human being on this planet.

Alright, so there are 3 Reasons Why Writers Should Know About the Distinction Between Theory and Practice. And, to be clear, this distinction is important for every human being. Really.

It is important in all aspects of our lives. When we are clear on the areas we want to develop and grow, we can engage with people in meaningful conversations and create contexts to move those aspects of ourselves forward.

We can learn more, become more, and then, yep, do more.

It has occured to me in writing this post that I can do a better job of letting readers know about the limits of my intellectual and practical knowledge.

Though the focus of my writing is, and will continue to be, on both my intellectual and practical knowledge, writing this post has brought a new awareness of this topic to the fore of my consciousness; and, for that I am grateful.

#beingunlimited, #development, #distinctionbetweentheoryandpractice, #growing, #onwriting, #owningourlimitations, #practice, #selfdimprovement, #theory, #theoryandpractice, #writing, #writingaboutpractice, #writingabouttheory, #writingandthoughtfulness, #writingandtrasnparency, #writingandtruth

Jeff Flesch 6:53 pm on July 27, 2020
Tags: beliefs ( 2 ), communication ( 9 ), concepts ( 5 ), creatingmeaning, creatingnarratives, creatingstories, Language ( 4 ), perceptions, philosohpy, practical, practice, Psychology ( 20 ), reality ( 39 ), socialpsychology, Sociology ( 15 ), stimulusresponse ( 2 )

4 Reasons Why Language Is Power

Ever thought about the power of language? Yes, no? I hadn’t until about three years ago. Why? Well, as I’ve mentioned in many of my posts, about three years ago I began to develop myself, really develop.

And, when you work on yourself, from the inside out, which is the only real way, you begin to understand the power that we, you, hold within you. It is a vast power, and language is a part of that power.

Before we begin to look at the power of language, let’s start with a definition.

language

NOUN
1. The method of human communication, either spoken or written, consisting of the use of words in a structured and conventional way.
Oxford Languages

Alright, pretty straightforward, right? Do you read anything in there about the power of language? No, me either. However, it’s there, believe me. Let’s take a look then at 4 reasons why language is so powerful.

1. Language is what we use to create meaning

As I’ve written about in other posts, human beings are meaning-makers. We continuously construct narratives, or stories, about life. We take in information, a stimulus, and we convert that information into a patterned story about how we perceive ourselves. Then we respond.

We respond from the space of the story. From the beliefs we hold about who we are. Can you see the power in that. Pretty powerful.

For instance, if we believe we are limited, because someone told us that when we were little, we will respond from a space of limit. Without thinking about it. Important.

In this example, it’s not as if we are consciously thinking about these limitations. These limitations live in the stories we tell ourselves, and others about who we are. They operate independently. Aware of them or not, they are there. Powerful.

Imagine deciding to not do something because someone told us not to do that thing when we were little. If we really sit inside of this concept, it may fill us with sadness.

Know, however, that at the end of this article we will discuss how to get in touch with the stories we have. Why? Because when we are aware of them, even though we don’t know all of them, we can choose a different response. We can create new stories.

Photo by S O C I A L . C U T on Unsplash

2. Language is what we use to communicate

Though verbal and written communication are not the only ways we communicate with each other, they are two of the primary ways we do so. We take that which we know to be “true,” drawn from the stories we have about ourselves, and use it to construct language to communicate with people.

Further, when we communicate with people, and they do or say something to confirm the story we have about ourselves, that story becomes more codified.

These stories, then, have been “confirmed” over years and years of inner-dialogue, and are also “proven” by those we interact with. Complex. And simple.

For instance, if I believe that I am limited, and act that way, then those around me, after time, will stop asking me to do things that stretch me, or make me uncomfortable.

Not because they don’t want me to stretch and grow, rather because I always say no. I confirm for them my own self-perceived limitation. And, in return, they confirm that limitation in my mind by not asking me to stretch and grow.

Thomas Cooley wrote about this concept over 100 years ago.

“The looking-glass self describes the process wherein individuals base their sense of self on how they believe others view them. Using social interaction as a type of “mirror,” people use the judgments they receive from others to measure their own worth, values, and behavior”
Lesley University

And, then sociologist Erving Goffman took Cooley’s work further.

“The term ‘symbolic interactionism’ refers, of course, to the peculiar and distinctive character of interaction as it takes place between human beings. The peculiarity consists in the fact that human beings interpret or ‘define’ each other’s actions instead of merely reacting to each other’s actions. Their ‘response’ is not made directly to the actions of one another but instead based on the meaning which they attach to such actions. Thus, human interaction is mediated by the use of symbols, by interpretation, or by ascertaining the meaning of one another’s actions.” (Blumer, p. 180, in Paul Gingrich)
Hawaii.edu

Therefore, how we think is how we act, believe, and perceive. And, those around us do the same. Have you ever had an interaction with someone that didn’t know you, and they interacted with you in a way that didn’t fit the story you have of yourself? Yes? What did you do?

Did you align with your own story about the person you believe yourself to be? Or, did you act in a different way? Most of the time, people will continue to behave as they have, which is consistent with the actions, beliefs, and perceptions they have of who they are.

Reason? Because to act, believe, and perceive otherwise is incongruent with their perceived identity. And, all of it, the actions we take, and the beliefs and perceptions we have first of all live in language. That is powerful.

3. Language is what we use to make sense of the world

When you look out your window, what do you see? A tree? A bush? The sun or moon? Whatever you see, and the words you use to describe the world all live in language. All of it.

Think about the word sun. Where did that come from? Well, let’s take a quick look.

Origin

“Old English sunne, of Germanic origin; related to Dutch zon and German Sonne, from an Indo-European root shared by Greek hēlios and Latin sol .”
Oxford Languages

And, even cursory searches of the internet will show that the roots of the word sun cross cultures.

“This is ultimately related to the word for “sun” in other branches of the Indo-European language family, though in most cases a nominative stem with an l is found, rather than the genitive stem in n, as for example in Latin sōl, Greek ἥλιος hēlios, Welsh haul and Russian солнце solntse (pronounced sontse), as well as (with *l > r) Sanskrit स्वर svár and Persian خور‎ xvar. Indeed, the l-stem survived in Proto-Germanic as well, as *sōwelan, which gave rise to Gothic sauil (alongside sunnō) and Old Norse prosaic sól (alongside poetic sunna), and through it the words for “sun” in the modern Scandinavian languages: Swedish and Danish solen, Icelandic sólin, etc.”
Handbook of Germain Etymology

Yet, is the sun, the sun? Or is it a star? Same with a tree. Is a tree, a tree? Or, is it something else. The point? That the language we use to describe the world becomes just that. The world we see. The world we know.

When we see a tree, we don’t question the fact that at some point a tree was not called a tree. Nor was the sun called the sun. They were called something else, or nothing at all.

The relationship we have with the language we use to describe the world we see and perceive as our reality, is therefore extremely important, and powerful. It must be.

4. Language is what we use to create our reality

Yep. Truth. Language is what we use to create meaning, to communicate, to understand the world, and to create our reality. In another post, I wrote something like, there are 7 billion different realities on this planet. Truth. How’s that?

Because we all understand our reality as we understand it. Yes, based on the stories we are told about who we are, the stories we then create to fit these stories, and the conformations we get from those around us that codify our notions of the stories we know to be true about who we are.

And, that is creating our reality. One thought, belief, and perception at a time.

However, because language, and our interpretation of it, is so powerful, we can also use language to create a different reality, with different stories, beliefs, and perceptions. Yep, we can.

As with most things, first you need to be aware of the power of language. Check. Then, it is about learning to notice when you are creating a reality that consistently fits the story of who you think you are. If that is what you want for your reality. Awesome. Done. If not?

Once you are aware, and notice how you consistently continue to create a response to a stimulus that is in alignment with, let us say, limitation, you can begin to choose a different response.

A response that aligns with the reality you now want to create. A reality without limits. Powerful.

Phew, that was a lot. More than I expected in this one post. Yet, because language is so powerful, there is a lot more to write about. A lot more.

Yet we will leave that to a future post.

Language is powerful. We can use language to confirm all the things we think about ourselves, given to us by someone else, and continuously confirmed by ourselves and everyone around us. OR.

We can use language to disrupt that which we believe we know about ourselves, and use the power of language to create a whole new reality for ourselves. And, guess what?

Everytime someone chooses disruption over the status quo, everyone benefits. All of humanity does.

#beliefs, #communication, #concepts, #creatingmeaning, #creatingnarratives, #creatingstories, #language, #perceptions, #philosohpy, #practical, #practice, #psychology, #reality, #socialpsychology, #sociology, #stimulusresponse

Jeff Flesch 10:41 pm on July 17, 2020
Tags: creatinglongtermgoals, creatingshorttermgoals, creatingyourfuture ( 3 ), dailyactions, goal setting ( 5 ), goals ( 2 ), growth ( 37 ), mindmaps, practice, selfdevelopment ( 49 ), theory ( 2 ), theoryandpractice ( 3 ), vision ( 14 )

Create A Vision For Your Future Self in 5 Minutes

Alright, I’ve written about creating a vision for yourself in several posts, yet, to date, have not walked through the process of doing so. What’s interesting is that people usually associate creating a vision with business, which makes sense, yet it makes as much sense, as we will discuss, to create a vision for yourself – for your life. Ready? Let’s go.

What’s first?

First, you want to get out all of your ideas about what your future self will look like, think like, and feel like. Here are some questions to get your thinking started.

What are your goals?
Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Where do you see yourself in 3 years?
Where do you see yourself in 1 year?

That’s enough to get us started. Let’s take them one at a time, and use practical examples. Here we go.

Identify your 5-year goals

Make a list of all of your goals. Yep, all of them. Why? Because at this stage, you are concentrating on getting out all of the goals that you want to accomplish. Make a list. Here are some of mine.

Publish a book
Travel to Spain
Learn Spanish
Travel to Japan
Knee recovery so I can run again
Expand our remote community education classes
Take a trip out of the country with my best friend

Alright, there are some we can work with. Once you have your goals identified, pick one to start working on. Where you start in the future will depend on the goal. I suggest going out as far as you can. Why?

Because you will find that once you start thinking about 5 years from now, let’s say, more goals will come to mind.

Now that you have your 5-year goals identified, time to start working those goals backward. Meaning that you need to create 3-year goals that connect to the 5-year goals.

Year 3

Let’s use my 5-year goal to publish a book and work that backward. In order to actually publish a book 5 years from now, I would like to have 75% of it written by year 3? Why? That will give me plenty of time to edit, market, and engage people about the book.

Now, publishing a book is not something I’ve ever done, and that is okay. The realisticness of your goals in year 3 matter less, than that you have an idea or picture of what that future state will look like.

Having that picture in mind is important to the next step, which is creating the next year inside of the 3-year goal.

The next year

When you start working on your goal for the next year, you are now in the realm of actually putting your theoretical goal into practice. I’m sure you’ve heard people say theory should feed practice, well, it is as true that practice should feed theory. They are inextricably linked. Always.

Now you can choose how to create your next year inside of the goal you are working on. There are many ways to put yourself to work inside of your goal. First you need to decide what your goal will look like at the end of the next year. Let’s keep using my goal of publishing a book.

What will the book look like at the end of the next year?

I would like to have 150 double-spaced pages written. Alright.

Now, to complete 150 pages by the end of next year, I will have to schedule time to get those pages written. How? First, create quarterly goals. With this particular example, I will break 150 pages into 4 parts.

My quarterly goal then is 38 pages. Now take that to monthly, which is 13 pages. Yep, now to the week. 3 pages a week. Alright, I now have a weekly goal.

And, it is a weekly goal that is connected to a quarterly goal, which is connected to a yearly goal. And, that yearly goal is connected to a 3 year goal, which is connected to the 5 year goal. Phew. Pretty cool.

Here is the system. And, you can put any goal into it, and work it backward the same way.

Identify all of your goals.
Pick one to work on.
Set that goal out into the future and visualize what it will look like.
Work backward to year 3.
Set that 3 year goal.
Work backward to the next year.
Set that yearly goal.
Work backward to each quarter.
Set that quarterly goal.
Work backward to each month.
Set that monthly goal.
Work that backward to weekly.
Set that weekly goal.

You can even take it to daily goal-setting, however, in this example it is not necessary. Now, if my goal was to get that book finished in the next year, taking the goal-setting to daily would actually be very helpful.

As you create these goals and work on them, know that you are actively creating the vision of your future self. Yep. And, as you put them into practice in your life, you are actively working on and creating your future self every day. Pretty cool, and fun.

How to organize them to ensure you move them forward?

Here are some tools you can use.

Calendars
Post-it boards
Whiteboards
Day planners.

How you organize yourself matters less than creating the actions and actually holding yourself accountable to doing them every day. Use whatever organization system that works for you.

And, if what you are using now doesn’t work, change it. There are tons and tons of tools for organization. So many.

Okay, that’s creating a vision of your future self in 5 minutes. Another thing I like to do with my goals is to create a mind map. As I’ve mentioned in many other posts, I am very visual, so I love to see my goals inside of a mind map.

In case you’ve not created a mind map, here is a quick video I created that describes the process.

Alright, you now have a system to create your future self. And, when you get into it, I think you’ll find that it is quite fun. And, guess what?

When you take those daily or weekly actions to create your future self, you will find that your longer term goals are being accomplished bit-by-bit each day. Happy creating.

#creatinglongtermgoals, #creatingshorttermgoals, #creatingyourfuture, #dailyactions, #goal-setting, #goals, #growth, #mindmaps, #practice, #selfdevelopment, #theory, #theoryandpractice, #vision

Jeff Flesch 3:53 pm on June 13, 2020
Tags: attention ( 3 ), breathing ( 3 ), focus ( 2 ), health benefits ( 2 ), Meditation ( 22 ), Mindfulness ( 19 ), persistence ( 8 ), practice, wellness ( 2 )

Creating a Meditation Practice: 3 Steps in 4 Minutes

Have you ever tried to meditate? Been through classes on meditation, yet continue to struggle to do so? You are not alone. It is too often the case that people take “meditation” classes or yoga classes, and yet struggle to have an experience they feel should be reminiscent of meditation. Sound familiar?

Well, let’s take a look at three simple steps that you can take to create the space you need to take up a practice that’s been on this planet for thousands of years. And, we will take a look at these three steps in just four minutes. Ready? Alright, let’s go.

Step 1: Quite Space

First, you must find a space that is quite, away from distractions, as much as possible. Then, let those around you know that you need this time to be alone. One of the biggest challenges in creating a meditation practice, is creating the space you need to do so. And, you are the one that needs to create this space.

You can create this space, by creating a new boundary with those closest to you. Let them know that this is your time, and is needed, and necessary. Sounds simple, yet most people have boundary issues, and may push on the boundry you are creating. Hold firm. This is your time, and you deserve it.

When I started meditating almost three years ago, the above referenced boundary issue was something that I struggled with. Yes, you also have to hold yourself accountable to create that boundary within yourself. Important. If you don’t hold to the boundary you are creating, no one else will. And, you will be continuously interrupted. What will it take?

It will take you creating that boundary over and over again. Eventually, those closest to you will get that you are serious, and leave you alone. Be persistent.

Step 2: Focus on Your Breathing

The first year of my meditation practice, I called it breathing. Why? Because I didn’t know how to breath properly. Most people don’t. That’s okay. You can learn.

Here is what my first year looked like

3 to 6 months – breathing for 5 minutes at a time, several times a day.
6 months to year 1 – breathing 15 minutes at a time, twice a day – once in the morning and once in the evening.

And, here is what years 2 and 3 have looked like

Year 1 to 18 months – meditating 20 to 30 minutes at a time, twice a day – once in the morning and once in the evening.
18 months to year 2 – meditating 30 to 45 minutes at time, twice a day – once in the morning, and once in the evening.
Year 2 to today – meditating 45 minutes to 1 hour at a time, mostly once a day, though sometimes twice. Second time being 30 minutes in the evening.

The important thing to note, and remember, is that it’s taken almost 3 years to go from breathing for 5 minutes, to meditating for an hour most days. Slow. Creating a meditation practice is not about how fast you can do it. It’s about taking your time, yet being persistent. Building the healthy habit, slowly and methodically.

Alright, when you are ready, here is a guide to your first 5-minute breathing exercise

Sit comfortably. You DO NOT have to sit in the lotus position. Actually I recommend not sitting like that. Simply sit in a sturdy chair, back straight, yet relaxed, hands resting on your thighs.
Set a timer, or a meditation app, if you have one for 5 minutes.
Close your eyes, and take a couple deep breaths, breathing in through your nose, and out through your nose. Slowly, deeply.
Now, breath normally, still in through your nose, and out your nose. And, as you breath in focus your attention on the air making its way through your nostrils – can you feel the cool air coming in? If not, that’s okay, then focus on the tip of your nose. If you can, focus on the air coming in through your nostrils.
As thoughts arsie, let them. If you begin to focus on them, that’s okay. When you begin to focus on a thought, simply bring your attention back to the air coming in through your nostrils, or back on the end of your nose.
And continue to repeat the above again and again. Thoughts arise, you notice, may even engage with them, then notice you are engaging, and refocus on your breath. Again, and again.

If you’ve just completed your first 5 minutes of breathing, nice job. You are on your way.

Step 3: Practice

Whether you are meditating for 5 minutes at a time, or an hour. Creating and maintaining a meditation practice, takes just that, practice. You must be willing to make meditation a priority in your life. It is like any healthy habit we want to develop; it takes persistence to build a regular habit.

The coolest thing about developing this habit, is that once you’ve done it for a couple of months, you will demand that space of yourself. Really, you will. You will hold yourself accountable to create that space; and, as you hold yourself to that standard, those closest to you, if they aren’t getting it, will.

And, the more you practice, the more benefits you will realize about incorporating meditation into your life. There are many. One of my favorite benefits, is that I have time for myself. Time to be quiet, away from all technology, and all people. We all need that time.

Practicing meditation is about learning how to focus your attention, as your mind continues to be busy. And, believe me, it will be. Yet, as we’ve discussed, let the thoughts come. It’s okay. And, as they come, notice when you are paying attention to them, instead of your breathing, and then refocus your attention on your breath.

Remember, creating a meditative practice takes time. Building this practice is not something that will happen overnight. It won’t, so relieve yourself of that pressure right now; and when you are ready, find a quiet space, focus on your breathing, and practice.

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