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Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 8:00 am on March 14, 2021
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A Blogger’s Diary 3/14/21: 2 Writing Reflections, Gardening, and Sleep

Photo by Eugene Chystiakov on Unsplash

I am pleased to report, we’ve had some lovely sunny weather the past few days. It’s been beautiful, and has warmed up 10 or so degrees.

In this part of the United States, March is typically the month where the weather begins to shift. While we will still have much more rain to come in March and April, we will continue to get more sun as we all progress towards spring.

I’ll have some more about the weather and my activities related to sunny weather in a moment. First, let’s have a couple writing reflections for this week.

Photo by Faye Cornish on Unsplash

2 Writing Reflections

A Reason

The poem A Reason occurred to me as I was reflecting upon my time at University. I went to school to pursue, at first, Sociology, and then later, Human Development and Family Studies. While my undergraduate degree, at 33 years old, was difficult, my graduate degree, starting at 38 and finishing at 42, was extremely difficult. The difference?

Why was graduate school so challenging? It all had to do with how I was thinking at that time. Unbeknownst to me at the time, I had fallen into a very negative and cynical interior dialogue with myself, that I didn’t know how to escape.

In fact, I wouldn’t fully “escape” this negative self-talk until completing my degree and coming to work at the community college, which I’ve written a little about in other posts.

At the time my negative self-talk was at its pinnacle, I was always searching for a reason, yet I was all the while looking in the wrong direction. Focusing outside of myself, instead of within. It’s not a demerit, it happened just as it was supposed to, just like me typing this blog post right now.

Yet, at the time, I didn’t know how to be in touch with myself, and it would take me several years, slowly, to learn through the guidance of my life coach. The point?

We all have negative self-talk. It’s not who you are. Your thoughts and feelings are not who you are. And, when we search in the right place for a reason, we will find a well that never runs dry.

Photo by Zac Durant on Unsplash

A Developmental Moment #6: Why Learning to Ask for Help is Necessary and Needed

I enjoyed writing, A Developmental Moment #6: Why Learning to Ask for Help is Necessary and Needed, most, because I spent many, many, years, my entire adult life, in fact, never asking for help. Not because, mind, I didn’t want to, rather because I didn’t know how. Further, I imagined that asking for help was in some way making me appear weak, and in some way deficient.

I think this type of thinking is especially prevalent in the United States, where the concept of individualism is so ingrained into all aspects of the country’s social institutions. The issue?

The concept of individualism is just that; a concept. It is illusory, as I’ve written about in other posts. Whether we actually ask for help, or not, we are always being helped by others. At the grocery store, gas station, coffee shop, or wherever you like to go. There is always someone there serving. Being of service. And, we are able to get the things we need, or want, because people are serving. Simple.

We can all learn to ask for help. Like all things in life, it takes practice, which I write about in this post. Starting small, and building from there. Next time you are feeling stressed, and know you are in need of help, ask. Ask someone that is close to you to assist you. There’s no demerit in it, and we are not deficient when we ask for help.

It’s the opposite. Asking for help is courageous, a sign of strength, and very wise.

Photo by Paige Cody on Unsplash

Gardening

Alright, now that we are in March, it’s time to, if you garden, to get seeds and garden plots ready. Well, as I’ve mentioned before, I moved to the other side of Corvallis a year ago now, and there is a lovely community garden about a mile from my place. And?

Well, I called Parks and Recreation last week, which runs the garden, and they had a spot! It’s 10’x20′, which admittedly is a little more space than I was looking for, however, I took it, and am very excited. I’ve not participated in a community garden in about 4 years, and am looking forward to gardening, yes please, and am also looking forward to meeting some new people. Also, yes please.

I am already working on a new post about my gardening experience, which I will be publishing in the next week or two.

Photo by Cris Saur on Unsplash

Sleep

I’m going to leave you this week, with the Monday message going out to the team tomorrow. Sleep is so important, as is understanding that when our sleep patterns iterate, like all things in life tend to, to listen to our bodies, and know that nothing in this world stays the same, even when we think it does. Here is the message.

This past year, I’ve been reflecting upon and experiencing new sleeping patterns. I’ve typically been the person that likes to stay up late into the evening. Well, about two years ago, this pattern began to change, and then? 

In the past year, my sleeping patterns have iterated a couple of times more. Beginning with, as I’ve mentioned to many of you, late afternoon, and early evening, at times, naps. And, now?

Now, the naps are not as present, yet going to bed at a much earlier hour is, as is getting up much earlier. The point?

There is no one way that sleeping occurs; and, actually, there is no one way anything occurs. Life iterates over time, and when we are present to new things, sleeping patterns, eating habits, whatever they may be for us, we have an opportunity, through new experiences, to learn more about who we are as human beings.

I invite you to always listen to your body, and when you are tired, to sleep; hungry, to eat. And, when not, well, to not.

Remember, there is no one way that life occurs on this planet. When we make sure to get our quiet time, as we’ve discussed the past couple of months, we can hear more, learn more, experience more, and be more.

Alright, that’s all for this week.

Have a wonderful week everyone.

#poetry, #areason, #askingforhelp, #blog, #blogger, #bloggers-diary, #blogging, #change, #courage, #development, #gardening, #poem, #sleepingpatterns, #spring, #strength, #wisdom

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 6:00 pm on March 13, 2021
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Quiet

Photo by Tom Morel on Unsplash

Branches of light
Breakthrough,
Filling me with resolve,
A unity so bold.

I travel light, prepared for
Anything that might frighten
me from my resolve.

Knowing that the fields and streams,
And everything in between is just as it
Should be, even when I hold too tight,
Dreaming of another’s plight.

A momentary glimpse of another
Shadow I’ve missed. Yet, it wasn’t
A part of this one’s story.

Letting go, with
All my might, an antonym delight.
Frenzied activity blends well with all
Of the mystery one does find, when quiet
Time is just right.

#poetry, #contemplation, #humanity, #introspection, #life, #love, #poem, #poems, #quiet

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 8:00 am on March 13, 2021
Tags: asking for help, , , , , , organizationalculture, , , , , synergy,   

A Developmental Moment #6: Why Learning to Ask for Help is Necessary and Needed

Why Asking for Help is a Strength not a Weakness

Photo by Fernando Venzano on Unsplash

The past two weeks I’ve been reflecting more upon patience and asking for help. The more people I meet, the more I realize just how important developing patience is, as is the ability to recognize when we need help.

Often people mistakenly believe that asking for help is, in some way, a demerit, or means they are in some way deficient. I would like to dispel this notion now.

When we ask for help, we are recognizing a limit, for the moment, to either what we know, or are capable of doing. It does not mean that we are deficient. In fact, it means the opposite.

Meaning that when we recognize a limit within ourselves, we immediately get to grow that limit to a new level. And, in that moment we are courageous. Many of the greatest leaders of all time recognize and celebrate this fact.

Here is a great quote from Barack Obama about asking for help.

AZ Quotes

Asking for Help 101

As I reflect upon times when asking for help was more difficult for me, I considered a few strategies that may be helpful for those that, like me, continue to see the action of asking for help as a developmental opportunity.

  • Start small – when asking for help, you can start small. Start by thinking about the areas in your work or life that you would either like to learn more about, or could use assistance with. For instance, when I first started to open up to the idea of asking for help, I would ask people to assist me with pieces of projects that fit their skill set. When you can ask someone for help, and give them a piece of work that excites or inspires them, it makes the process of asking for help a little easier.
  • Begin with people you already trust – one of the reasons I shied away from asking for help was because I was concerned about looking incompetent, which is a simple thinking error. When we don’t ask for help, and we try to do everything on our own is, in fact, when incompetence will be seen and felt. However, one way to allay the fear of looking incompetent by asking for help, is to ask someone you already know and trust.
  • Make it a healthy habit – the only way to really make asking for help stick in your life, is to do it regularly. Simply meaning, that creating a healthy habit of asking for help when needed, will continue to push you outside of your comfort zone. However, the more you ask for help, the less uncomfortable it will feel.

There are three simple strategies you can use to begin to ask people for help. Remember, we are always getting help from people around us, always. Whether we are aware of it or not, we are all connected and interdependent. Yep, true.

As we have discussed, asking for help is a courageous act. Yet, people continue to see asking for help as something that is a weakness. Let’s continue to bust this myth, shall we? Good. Here we go.

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

A Strength Not A Weakness

Here are a few more reasons why asking for help is needed and necessary, and should be considered a strength not a weakness.

  • Relationships – when we ask someone for help, we are acknowledging that relationships matter to us. That, in fact, we are vulnerable enough to say, “you know, I don’t know.” Important. When we are vulnerable in our relationships, and that vulnerability is reciprocated, our relationships become deeper and more meaningful.
  • Connection – when we learn to ask for help, we become more open. More open to asking people we don’t know for help. As we pursue asking people we don’t know for help, we create the opportunity to meet new people; and, to deepen our connection with our own humanity, and the humanity of others.
  • Collaboration – as we practice asking for help, we learn that this practice becomes a strength. We learn that asking for help is essential in order to really collaborate with other people. No true collaboration exists without asking for help. Simple.
  • Synergy – as we begin to collaborate more, we realize that inside of true collaboration exists a very powerful concept, called synergy. Synergy occurs when people are aligned, work together, and help each other. When you work on a team that has synergy, you are able to innovate and execute inside of any situation. Why? Because you’ve learned to ask for help. You’ve learned that asking questions, and asking for help is an essential part of being a human being.

Alright, there are a few more reasons why asking for help is needed and necessary, and why asking for help is a real strength.

If you’re not used to asking for help. Don’t worry. Try some of the strategies listed above in asking for help 101; and remember, when we ask for help, we are admitting, yes, we don’t know something, or need assistance in completing something. And, guess what?

We all don’t know many things; and, we all need assistance getting things done. We do. It’s not a demerit. It’s the opposite.

Asking for help is a sign of courage and a sign of your inner strength.

#asking-for-help, #collaboration, #connection, #courageous, #humandevelopment, #leadershipdevelopment, #organizationalculture, #relationships, #self-development, #strategy, #strength, #synergy, #teamdevelopment

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 6:00 pm on March 12, 2021
Tags: , , , , , , , , seed,   

Tanka #8

Photo by Jill Dimond on Unsplash and Photo by Edurne Chopeitia on Unsplash

dry and arid landscape,
cracks in the ground bring water,
seed to stem, renew.
I reflect upon us all,
humanities resilience.

#poetry, #life, #love, #nature, #poem, #poems, #renewal, #reslience, #seed, #tanka

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 6:00 pm on March 11, 2021
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Blossom

Photo by Ghana Shyam Khadka on Unsplash

Petals touch the earth, it’s such a dearth
Of our collective humanity. The mundane meets
The profane, in an elegant dance of universality.

Closed and subdued, waiting in the wings for
Just the right moment to spring forth and collect
Their special moment, looking at you, and
seeing right through.

Some open a little at a time, you walk past,
And notice, just every so slightly, their petals
Begin to give way to the universal force bearing
Their name, feeling inspiration, your claim.

Others open in a flurry, one day completely
Closed, then the next, rising to meet the
Golden sun, shining deep inside filtrating out
All the things that hide.

The point?

They all grow from the same earth, and
Have their own way to walk through this mirth.
Casting a special glow through all that pass by,
Waiting for that special moment to blossom forth.

#poetry, #blossom, #earth, #humanity, #life, #love, #nature, #poem, #poems

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 6:00 pm on March 10, 2021  

Haiku #12

Photo by Claire Rush on Unsplash

The fire burns brightly,
Crackling and singing night.
Fire dying. Embers.

Photo by Siim Lukka on Unsplash
Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 6:00 pm on March 9, 2021
Tags: , , , , , , , , roar, , woman, women   

Roar

Image credit; Jayson Hinrichsen @ Unsplash

They look into my eyes,
And I wonder why, or why they even try.

They think their stare a dread,
Yet it’s more often just a shred. A glimpse
Into their being, having nothing whatsoever
To do with my leaving.

I am not the names and forms
You associate with me in your head.

Furthermore, it’s mine to lay claim
To all that I am, when I’d like,
so don’t be such a bore.

And?

I Am Woman, here me roar.

In response to the WDYS #72 prompt from Keep it Alive, by Sadje.

This short poem had a four-fold inspiration; one, the image prompt from Keep it Alive; two, the movie I Am Woman, which I’m watching on Netflix; three, my courageously strong and beautiful sisters, mother, and ex-wife; and four, all of the myriad of women that have coached and mentored me throughout my life, of which, there have been many.

#poetry, #beauty, #life, #love, #poem, #poems, #power, #resilience, #roar, #strength, #woman, #women

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 6:00 pm on March 8, 2021
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A Reason

Photo by Sawyer Bengtson on Unsplash

Strange as it can sometimes seem,
Yes, just like a dream, everything is in motion
In this life, just like it is supposed to be.

Everyone plays their part, from the very start, even when
We second-guess, and are confused about
The hidden art, which conjures such scenes
Of mystery, confusion, and, yes sometimes
Delusion.

Living inside of the unknown can be precarious,
And even downright gregarious and, at times,
Even quite nefarious.

Yet, living inside a dream isn’t always as
It seems. There is a rhyme and reason in
Every season, even when, maybe, especially
When we are searching for a reason.

#poetry, #areason, #life, #love, #poem, #poems, #unknown

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 6:00 pm on March 7, 2021
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A Blogger’s Diary 3/7/21: Two Writing Reflections, Change, and Coaching

Photo by Neel on Unsplash

Well, last week was the first week of registration, and thus far we are busier than last term, which is grand. It will be interesting to see how registration goes the next couple of weeks.

The Saturday paper today read that the Governor of Oregon was intent that all Oregonians receive vaccinations by the end of June. And, in that same press release, the Governor also stated that people working in higher education will be vaccinated by April 1.

I am cautiously optimistic. Meaning, that the plan is a good one, and I appreciate the Governor for creating a strong vision, yet with all of the challenges and changes this past year, I think, staying in our current reality, for now, is best. And, our current reality?

Well, Benton County, where I live is still categorized as extreme risk, whereas Linn County, where I work is categorized as moderate risk. Yes, precarious.

The team and I are planning to be remote the rest of this fiscal year, and if that changes, we will face those changes at that time.

Alright, let’s discuss writing. Here are two reflections from this week.

Photo by Ksenia Makagonova on Unsplash

Writing

Found

As I was thinking about writing the poem Found, I was reflecting upon living in Flagstaff, AZ, which is 7000 feet in elevation and gets about 90 inches of snow in the winter. It is an amazing little town, and is beautiful throughout the entire year. Growing up in Los Angeles, the only time I experienced snow was when we traveled to Big Bear, which we did maybe once every other year.

Living in Flagstaff for 4 years was, well, very different, in that we had to learn how to live in the snow. As I reflected upon our time there, I was thinking about hiking in the snow, which is a lovely experience. You can come upon whole meadows, which are completely covered in snow, as far as you can see.

The reflection also reminded me of being disconnected from my inner-self for a long time, and how that’s not the case anymore, and it feels, well, beautiful.

Brilliance

The reflection for this poem was inspired by the WDYS prompt from Keep it Alive, by Sadje. A beautiful picture of the Taj Mahal, with the sun rising directly behind it, reminded me of majesty and brilliance.

I only partake in a couple of prompts today, and appreciate the inspiration these wonderful bloggers create. It is super fun each week to wait and wonder about the prompt, and then to get the reveal. Wonderful.

The picture of the Taj Mahal also reminded me of humanities resilience, and the beauty in standing for each other.

Photo by Reign Abarintos on Unsplash

Change

I’ve been thinking more about change this past week, as some states across the country begin to relax pandemic restrictions.

It reminds me that we will all have a lot of change coming in the next year, and, well, actually the next couple of years as we all learn to live in our new realities, whatever they end up being.

It also reminds me of the necessity and need of being gentle and patient with ourselves and each other. There is a lot that can be gained when we are gentle and exercise our patience. We get more for ourselves, and we give more back out to those we love and care about.

As we continue to face new changes this coming year, remember to be gentle and patient with yourself.

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

Coaching

I am excited to report that I have two new clients. They’ve both come through work, and I am really enjoying working with both of them.

One is a small business owner, and the other is a local professional. I’ve been coaching people for many years, and it is one of the things I enjoy most about my work. I love to work with people on their personal and professional development, just as much as I do on my own development.

It is in conversations and relationships with other people where innovation, creativity, and developmental growth can occur. And, you know, every time I have a new client, I always learn something more about myself. Every time. Reciprocity is beautiful that way.

Alright, that’s all for this week.

Be well, love well, live well, and have a wonderful week.

#blogger, #bloggers-diary, #blogging, #change, #coaching, #covid-19, #diary, #poems, #relfection, #writing

Unknown's avatar Jeff Flesch 8:00 am on March 7, 2021
Tags: , blueexpanse, blueskies, clearskies, , , , , , ragtag   

Blue Expanse

Photo by Marla Prusik on Unsplash

Looking up into the blueness,
The vastness of space collected
Together for our mutual endeavor,
And our innermost pleasure.

It’s beholden to see, such a treasure
Of sight, and delight. It often reminds
Me of being a young boy, living freely, no limits
In sight, breathing in all of life’s gifts one at a time.

And, today, even on gray days, I can see
Through that pillowy cover to the blueness
That is there, awaiting the next time, the next breath,
Winds shifting with our beating hearts,
To reveal the depth of the drifting blue expanse.

In response to the Saturday RagTag Daily Prompt, by Punam.

#poetry, #blueexpanse, #blueskies, #clearskies, #life, #love, #nature, #poem, #poems, #ragtag