The Reflection Series Part 3: What Does it Mean to Live A Life of Wonder?

A 3-Minute Reflection On Creating Wonder

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A week or two ago, I wrote a poem about wonder, and since then, I’ve been reflecting upon creating wonder. Yep. Wonder is all around us all the time, yet we don’t always see it. Hm. Why would that be, I wonder? Pun intended.

Alright, so let’s take a quick look at wonder, shall we? Good. Let’s go.

Though we can all probably agree on what wonder is, let’s define it real quick. Here we go.

wonder

Pronunciation /ˈwəndər/ 

Translate wonder into Spanish

NOUN

A feeling of surprise mingled with admiration, caused by something beautiful, unexpected, unfamiliar, or inexplicable.

Lexico

There we go. That’s pretty straightforward. Yes? Yep.

Now, if we take all that we know, and then think about all that is knowable, I mean, really knowable, which is quite vast, we should often get a sense of surprise and admiration. Yep. Why?

Because there is so much around us to learn about, from people, yes, of course, and from just wondering about that which we see. Really.

The sky at night with the prolific array of stars and galaxies.

Photo by Kyle Cottrell on Unsplash

The sky during the day, with the majestical and seemingly dancing clouds overhead.

Photo by Ritam Baishya on Unsplash

A forest, with trees dripping with water and covered in moss, a floor alive with movement and life. Phew. So much around us.

Photo by Joshua Earle on Unsplash

The issue? Well, quite simply, we have become habituated to doing, instead of being. A paradox? Yep, of course. Why?

Because the natural questions here is, what is the difference between doing and being? Yep. And?

Well, they look exactly the same. Yet, they are different. Hence the paradox.

When we are doing, and doing only, we are focused on the action at hand, and believe that we alone are responsible for that action and the related result.

When we are being, we are still doing, yet we are doing so, no pun intended that time, from a different state.

A state that impels us to an understanding that we are actors in a play, or drama, called life. And, that there is something going on here that is much larger than ourselves, which includes and connects each and everyone us us.

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Yep. That’s pretty much it.

In this state, there is still a focus on doing, yet the doing is part of that larger process. A process of life, yes, and of being. Beautiful.

As for creating wonder?

Well, it is really about being present to that larger process. Moving ourselves from the micro-level, if you will, to the macro-level.

Meaning, recognizing ourselves within the context of that larger process, and connection with everyone and everything.

When we are present to the larger process, called life, we become more aware of the beauty and wonder in all things and in each other.

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And, being present?

Well, that does take practice. As I’ve written about in many other posts, meditation has been transformational for me in many areas, presence being one of them.

However, you don’t necessarily need to take up a meditation practice to practice being present.

You can simply take a walk by yourself, and notice. Notice all that is around you. Watch as the leaves fall from the tree, as the clouds move across the sky, as people move from here to there, and notice the beauty and wonder in all of it.

It is quite majestical, and wonderous. Just like you are.

#beingpresent, #connection, #doingandbeing, #life, #lifeparadox, #oncreatingwonder, #processoflife, #reflectiononwonder, #wonderandlife

3 Paradoxes of Leadership All Leaders Should Know

A Journey From the Unknown to the Known

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I often write about paradoxes, well, because life is full of them. Really. And, as we recognize a paradox, we are poised to reconcile what is seemingly unknown into something that is known. Yep.

And, how does that aid leaders? Well, first, I consider leadership something that lives inside of everyone. Yep.

Leadership is something we can all do; and, in fact, leadership is something that most of us already do. Really. In some way in our life, we lead. Even if the leading you do is just for you; you are still leading.

And, we also know that in leadership the self is where it all starts. Yep. Also tue. Leadership goes out from you to everyone and everything else. It’s just how it works.

Leaders also need to know that most things are unknown, and that we know far less than is knowable. Important.

Therefore, inside of a paradox, there is an opportunity to turn something unknown into known, which is helpful for yourself, yep, and for everyone you are leading.

Now, before we go further, let’s define leadership, so we are all on the same page. Okay? Good. Here we go.

leadership

Pronunciation /ˈlēdərˌSHip/ /ˈlidərˌʃɪp/ 

NOUN

The action of leading a group of people or an organization.

The state or position of being a leader.

Lexico

Right. Pretty ambiguous. Hm.

Let’s try lead instead. Here we go.

lead

Pronunciation /lēd/ /lid/ 

TRANSITIVE VERB led

[WITH OBJECT]

Cause (a person or animal) to go with one by holding them by the hand, a halter, a rope, etc. while moving forward.

Show (someone or something) the way to a destination by going in front of or beside them.

Lexico

Ah, much better. Here is what we have so far. A leader is someone that goes with someone, or shows someone something by going in front of or beside them. Very good.

Alright, so what are these three paradoxes? Right. Let’s get right into our discussion, shall we? Good. Here we go.

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1. The Real and The Ideal

As a leader it is important to know the current reality. Meaning to know your strengths and weaknesses, and that of the teams. Super important. Yet, that’s not all. Nope.

You must also communicate that reality, and do so often. One of the most important functions in leadership is setting the pace and the reality. A reality that will include both strengths and weaknesses. It has to.

We all have areas to develop, as do teams, and when we own them, guess what?

We have now created a context that welcomes development, one that is open and growth-oriented. Fun.

Now, once you know and have communicated the current reality, it is time to begin to balance the real (current state or reality) with the ideal (future state or reality). Very important.

And, how this is done is predicated on knowing that everything we do today informs tomorrow, and that tomorrow is simply a mirror of today. Yep. Say more? Of course. Here we go.

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2. Today and Tomorrow

Alright, so when we cast a vision for our life or our team, we are setting down in language that which we want to accomplish in a certain amount of time. Might be a week, a month, a year, or several years. Depends.

What matters is that we tie that vision, those specific goals, to objectives and priorities that we can set our sights on and work towards each day. Yep.

When we connect our daily actions to our long-term goals, we are actively creating tomorrow today. Wait, what? Yes. It’s true.

When we take actions today that are connected to goals we have in the future, we are creating our future from this very moment. Therefore, when we take action today, tomorrow ends up being a mirror of today. Meaning?

We are actively actualizing tomorrow’s goals today. One action at a time. Fun. And, truth.

The concept of creating your future from today is a very powerful concept for leaders, teams, and, well, everyone. And, what happens when we create a context full of this type of possibility?

Well, we lead, yes, and so do those around us. It works that way.

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3. Lead and Follow

Right, so leadership as we’ve defined it has to do with going out in front, paving the way, if you will, with a vision that ties back to objectives and priorities that you, and your team, if you have one, work on each day. Yep.

And, when you are out in front like that, sometimes, you will have to pull back a bit, as the team moves closer to you. Yep. Or, if they are moving quickly, you may have to go out in front even further. Depends. And, guess what?

Sometimes, your team will move right on past you. Yep. Can and does happen. It is a beautiful thing to see really. And, when that happens?

No problem here, you, like they would, catch back up. Simple. The point?

That leadership is a complex, and yet very simple, set of relationships you have. First with yourself. Always with yourself first. And, then with everyone else around you.

Relationships are leadership. And, leadership is about having high-quality relationships. Yep. Bottom line? Sure.

Leaders lead and follow, both. They are, in fact, one and the same. Not separate at all. One.

Alright, so there are three leadership paradoxes that, when we have an awareness of how they function, create a context where we are connecting the unknown of tomorrow, or 5 years from now, to today. Meaning?

That we are creating the known from the unknown. In this very moment, in fact. And, well, that’s fun, and powerful.

#creatingthefuture, #fromtheunknowntothenkown, #humandevelopment, #leadandfollow, #leadership, #leadershipdevelopment, #leadershipmindset, #leadershipparadox, #therealandtheideal, #todayandtomorrow

A Poem at The Precipice

Photo by Katie Drazdauskaite on Unsplash

We stand before it,
Vastness unbound
In a realm where we
Sometimes
Feel bound to the ground

Darkness, looking out
Over the edge,
As the rubble underneath foot
Meets earth, and we realize
There is no dearth

We fledge
And make a pledge
As we move closer to the ledge
Heart beating faster,
As we face
What some may see as disaster

Yet, we know
It is in each step
Taken
Where we move closer
To that
Which is faster,

A quickening

For it is at that ledge
Of the unknown
Where the beauty of life
Is foretold

Faith and trust
In a process far
Larger
Than is known

#life, #poem, #poems, #precipice, #unkownandknown, #writing

A Poem of Peace

Photo by Christopher Sardegna on Unsplash

Twas childhood days,
Once betrayed, and
As a part of our current dismay
Of times gone by

As we try to recreate, a time
And place of forgotten space, and
Distant landscape

A notion of a potion,
We’ve pulled forward
In an effort to alleviate our emotion
Of a common commotion

Of a mind restless and eager
To anticipate a thread, of the
Bed we’ve made bare
Though we do not dare

To tread alone into the emptiness
And stare
Out at the majesty which is there

We need not compare this day

With times gone by,
Instead
Practice the release
Of the surcease, during
This winters masterpiece
Of a life once known to be at peace

For peace is always there,
A comfort for your care, so, please
Always remember you
Are a child of the Lord’s Prayer
.

#life, #live, #peace, #poem, #poems, #writing

Why It’s Important to Understand Your Own Sensitivity As A Gift

A Spectrum of Sensitivities

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In the post, The Paradox and Gift of Being A Highly Sensitive Person: Clear and Strong, Not Hurt and Damaged, we unpacked and discussed sensitivity in terms of being a highly sensitive person.

For me, it then follows to ask the question, is high sensitivity binary, as in you have it or you don’t? Or, rather, is high sensitivity a spectrum of experiences? Hm. Good questions. Let’s take a look, shall we?

Alright, so let’s first define binary and spectrum. Ready? Good. Here we go.

binary

noun /ˈbaɪnəri/ /ˈbaɪnəri/,  /ˈbaɪneri/ (computing, mathematics)

a system of numbers that uses only 0 and 1

Oxford Learner’s Dictionaries

Well, that’s fun. Now, for the purpose of this conversation, think about being highly sensitive as a 1 and not being highly sensitive as a 0. Make sense? Okay, good. Now spectrum.

spectrum

noun  /ˈspektrəm/ /ˈspektrəm/(plural spectra  /ˈspektrə/  /ˈspektrə/)

[usually singular] a complete or wide range of related qualities, ideas, etc.

Oxford Learner’s Dictionaries

There we go. Again, for the purpose of this conversation, you can think about a complete or wide range of related sensitivities, as a spectrum of sensitivity. Make sense? Good.

Now, why is this important? Good question.

Photo by Laura Ockel on Unsplash

Sensitivity as a Spectrum

Because if we think about sensitivity as binary, we limit the experience of being a sensitive human being; and, we also limit our own experience of what it means to be sensitive.

As we discussed in the previous post on sensitivity, being sensitive is not a problem or an issue, it is, rather a gift. And, being able to own that gift, and really internalize it as such is an important and empowering experience.

Really, important.

And, at the same time, it is equally important for everyone to have access to the possibility that they are also sensitive. Why?

Because understanding our sensitivities, whatever they might be, is such an important aspect of being a human being. Truly, truly, this is so.

People that are highly sensitive often turn to substance abuse and other forms of self-abuse in order to dull their sensitivity. And? It is extremely damaging.

Yes, of course, for the person with sensitivity, and also, for those around them. Both. Yet, it need not be that way. Truly.

Photo by Ilkka Kärkkäinen on Unsplash

Are You a Highly Sensitive Person?

Here are a couple of questions you can ask yourself to see if you too might be a highly sensitive person. Ready? Good. Here we go.

  1. Are you sensitive to light?
  2. How about being sensitive to cold or heat?
  3. Maybe you are sensitive to noise?
  4. Are you easily overwhelmed?
  5. Do you feel your own emotions more?
  6. How about feeling other people’s emotions more?

Now, you can use these questions, if you choose, to start an investigation into your own sensitivity. Yep. Oh, me?

Yes, to every question listed above, and more. I typically score between 17 and 19 on the highly sensitive person questionnaire, which I recommend everyone take. Everyone. Seriously. Why?

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Sensitivity As a Gift

Because finding out that I was a highly sensitive person was pivotal in my life. A gift, as was previously stated.

Therefore, I want to make sure everyone has the opportunity to explore their sensitivity, free from bias and judgment. Yep, that’s about it.

Further, I believe that everyone is highly sensitive in some way. Really. I do.

Remember, sensitivity is a spectrum, not binary. Meaning, that it is quite possible that everyone in some way is highly sensitive to something. Yep. Possible. And?

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

Removing the Stigma of Being Sensitive

Well, removing stigma about sensitivity, especially in the United States, is super important. Especially for young boys. Really.

Young boys are often raised to dissociate themselves from their sensitivity, yet, that is so very unhealthy. It is unhealthy for them as a developing child and youth, and is also unhealthy, as we’ve discussed, for them later in life.

What is healthy?

Proper education about sensitivity. For instance, positive reinforcement and education about what sensitivity means; and, knowledge about how to cope with emotions. All. Important.

Bottom line? Sure. Here we go.

We all have sensitivities. We have to. Why? Because we are all human, and all humans have senses. And, these senses are, at times, maybe all the time, sensitive. And?

That is perfectly okay. More, as we’ve discussed, it is a gift.

Embracing our sensitivity creates more possibility. More possibilities about ourselves and our lives, and more possibilities for those around us.

When we model acceptance of our sensitivity, we remove the stigma about sensitivity and create spaces that are more inclusive and loving.

And, I for one, think that acceptance, inclusivity, and love are needed in this world. Nay, they are very much needed in this world. Today, yep, and, well, tomorrow too. And, for all time.

#acceptance, #emotionalintelligence, #empowermentandsensitivity, #healthysensitivity, #highlysensitivepeople, #hsp, #humandevelopment, #leadership, #love, #selfimprovement, #sensitivityasagift, #spectrumofsensitivities

A Perspective Poem

Photo by Nadine Shaabana on Unsplash

Time flies away
That which we try to see by day
Never stopping in times array
Of a distant, yet close ballet

Of moving parts and pieces
A dance, seemingly unordered
And static that ceases

A play in motion, which
Can cause quite the commotion
Of mind, until we find
That peace of Mind, which
Comes with devotion, and

Faith in that which is unseen
And seen, beauty
Is in the eye of the beholder, of

A knowing that shoulders

A fire that burns and smolders
Like a love that is bolder, and
Just as it soon as it seems colder
An awareness dawns, bright

With a voluminous light, which
Negates the night, and
Warms us within our heart’s delight

Be well, everyone.

#life, #poem, #poems, #writing

A Blogger’s Diary 11/1/20: On the Paradox of Poetry, Writing, and Life

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Well, we are two days away from the election, COVID-19 cases are up in Oregon, we are continuing to deliver classes and training remotely, and I’ve been writing more poetry lately. Hm. Interesting.

Right, so here’s what I was up to this week, in the event you missed it.

There we go. See. More poetry.

Photo by Trust “Tru” Katsande on Unsplash

Poetry

It is interesting to consider. I do like writing poetry, and am having a lot of fun doing so. Funnily enough, as I’ve written before, I haven’t read much poetry, though when I find poetry I like, I go back to it again and again.

And, I’ve been reading a lot more poetry lately from the blogs of some of the most outstanding poets and writers. Lovely.

I also love the challenge of writing poetry. It is an interesting paradox. In some ways it is easier than the other topics I choose to write about, and yet, in many ways much more difficult. Hm.

I enjoy sitting with a peice, pondering it, reflecting upon it, until the right words show up. Fun. I also like being out on a walk or hike, and find that inspiration stirring me to stop on the path, and make notes in my phone.

That is exactly how the road poem showed up today.

Photo by Hannah Olinger on Unsplash

Writing

I have some ideas for next week, yet, if you read my last installment, A Blogger’s Diary 10/24/20: On Writing, Reading, and 200+ Followers, you will note that my writing plan changed as this week progressed.

Is it like that for you? It is often that way for me.

Anyway, at this time, I have planned another installment on sensitivity, a piece on sociology, and, hm, ah yes, a post on wonder. That’s what I have for now anyway. The poetry, you ask? Good question.

You know that works a little differently than the other things I choose to write about. Well, sort of.

With poetry, I usually see something that inspires me, and then from that derive a concept and then write. So, in a way the process is similar to my other writing, and yet feels a little different.

Photo by Melissa Askew on Unsplash

Life

Lastly, I wanted to acknowledge just how hard this year has been for everyone. Really. It has been.

Yet, I also want to acknowledge the resiliency of the human spirit. Very resilient. Much more resilient than people imagine. And, it is beautiful to be a part of and to witness.

I have found and read so many inspirational stories this year. Please know that you are all inspirational to me. All of you.

Though life has been extraordinarily hard this year, and, well, looks like it will continue to be, at least from a pandemic perspective, for some time; know that you are bringing people hope and joy each and every day by writing as you do. Just as you are and as you do. Wonderful.

I’ve laughed and teared more at my computer screen these past few months than at any other time in my life. And, I’m not young. Ha!

Right. Well, it is about time to wrap up this installment. Yet, before I do, let me leave you with two quotes I adore from two very inspirational people. Here you go.

“Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.”
― Helen Keller

Driven

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”
― Maya Angelou

Driven

Lovely.

Have a wonderful week everyone.

#poetry, #blogger, #bloggersdiary, #blogging, #covid-19, #diary, #elections, #helenkeller, #life, #quotes, #resilience, #writing

A Poem of The Road

Corvallis, 2020

The Road
A path laid bare
For all who dare, to
Travel it without great fanfare

Bumpy it will be, and
Forks you will see
Left or right decisions are alright,
Yet choices never ware

For it is within our hearts compare
Where you must dare, to
Find yourself in times of despair, and
Tranquility both, in belief are fair

And, thus do complete our affair
Of a minute and distant, yet
Relevant pair, seemingly
Two, yet unknown and known as one

Left or right, choose one, and
Have faith that all will be just right
For it isn’t in the choice that knows
It’s in the poise that shows

Of the strength you have inside

A knowing that knows, of
The home that shows
That left or right, path
Smooth or stoned, will prove
To be your purposed road and abode

#poem, #poemandwriting, #poems, #purpose, #writing